I was prepared for motherhood in the form of baby blankets, clothes, gear, special pillows, and bottles. I had read the most popular books and had attended new parent classes, but in all of my preparation I had never considered how the gospel applies to motherhood. I was aware of the many expectations and standards held by friends, relatives, and prestigious institutions, but I had no understanding of what standards—if any—were held by the Lord.

Out of a desire to make sense of what felt like a completely new life now that I was a mother, I began meeting weekly to study the Bible with other Christians and those who were simply curious about Jesus from the community. While every meeting encouraged my tired body and my growing faith, one morning these powerful words were shared and etched into my heart, “You are responsible for being obedient to the Lord. You are not responsible for the outcome.”

Can there be anything more affirming to tell a mother? Those words lifted a weight off of me that I hadn’t even known was there. What a countercultural idea, this concept that through the application of our faith we have the choice of surrendering responsibility for providing the best outcomes for our children: saving-faith in Jesus, deep friendships, enriching educational experiences, strong physical health, (the list of the good things we desire to provide for our children is seemingly never-ending). By entrusting the outcomes to the Lord, we become free and reenergized to parent with the limited resources that the Lord continuously gives to us.

Obeying Jesus

Before Jesus left earth and returned to be with God the Father, he told his disciples to be obedient to him, saying, “Go, therefore, and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe everything I have commanded you” (Matthew 28:19-20, emphasis added). Jesus himself asks us for our obedience.

Although the Bible emphasizes the priority of faithfulness to Jesus, interpreting what it means to obey or disobey Jesus can be hotly debated, even among Christians. Scripture tells believers to pursue obedience rather than allowing our assurance of forgiveness through Jesus’ death and resurrection to allow us to think lightly of sin and continue in sinful behavior.[1]

To use a definition as a starting point, we act faithfully when our actions are “full of faith”, and to be “full of faith” our actions must be in accordance with our faith. While determining whether specific actions as mothers are faithful and obedient to Jesus’ teachings remains nuanced and beautifully complex, we can turn to the Bible to see what actions Jesus found pleasing to him. 

In the Gospel of Matthew, Jesus praises a mother for her faithfulness after she sought him out on behalf of her ill daughter. In the face of opposition from Jesus’ disciples, the mother continued crying out to Jesus for mercy, and we are told, “…she came, knelt before him, and said, “Lord, help me!” (Matthew 15: 25) 

In the same way, we can be faithful mothers by seeking Jesus’ presence in prayer and by honoring him as our personal lord, even when we don’t know the outcome of our requests. We act in faith when we seek his guidance and worship him in the days of functioning off of minimal sleep, managing toddler tantrums, or navigating stressful relationships. We come faithfully to him through prayer knowing that our pursuit of living faithfully for him is pleasing to him. He may even be saying over us in the same words that he said to the mother described in Matthew: “Woman, your faith is great” (Matthew 21:28).

Entrusting Jesus with the Outcomes

The faithful mother trusted that Jesus had power over whether her daughter would be healed, and we can also chose to trust—albeit sometimes more easily than others—that he has power over every outcome in our life and in the lives of our family members. After Jesus defeated death and sin, he confirmed the extent of his power, telling his disciples,“…All authority has been given to me in heaven and on earth” (Matthew 28:18).

Jesus was completely faithful and obedient to God the Father.[2] He chose to live a perfect life and to die an innocent death on our behalf so that we, as imperfect people, can have a relationship with a perfect God. When we seek to live obediently for God’s glory, we reflect a glimpse of Jesus’ faithfulness.

Striving for perfection in motherhood—without Jesus’ power and grace—drives us away from faithfulness and towards a desire to assure for ourselves every desired outcome, but by surrendering the outcomes to the Lord we consciously prioritize our relationship with Jesus and our lives can become filled with actions obedient to Jesus. As a result, our faithfulness has the potential to draw those around us—as well as ourselves—deeper into a relationship with the Lord.

By surrendering control, we glorify the Lord by attributing every result to his doing rather their our own. By being faithful to Jesus in our experience of motherhood, we bring more praise and glory to his name, and by glorifying God, we participate in the very thing our souls were created to do.[3]

[1] Rom. 6:1-4

[2] Phil. 2:5-11

[3] II Cor. 5:9-10